Are You Cool Enough for Country Fair?
- Jul 31, 2015
- 6 min read
Oregon Country Fair 2015
We have been going to Pacific Northwest festivals for the past few years. The word festival often provokes thoughts of Burning Man and Woodstock or simply thoughts of painted people drinking and smoking their potions. There are festivals celebrating everything; candles, kites, music, comics, hemp, and really anything you can think of. Dune fest is a just a hippie festival with horsepower and even a college or pro football game is simply a festival celebrating football, complete with painted people drinking and smoking their potions. Any motorsport event is a festival celebrating racing just as any concert is a festival celebrating music, also complete with painted people drinking and smoking their potions. Every rodeo is a cowboy festival and even today’s mega churches hold festivals every Sunday celebrating different gods, also complete with painted people drinking and smoking their potions. It’s what we like to do no matter what slice of life we come from. We paint ourselves up to go where there are tons of people watching stuff we like to watch then we eat, drink and smoke watching cool stuff. The quintessential hippie festival takes place in the trees just outside of Veneta, Oregon and if you want to paint yourself up to eat, drink and smoke among painted people then there is no better place to be than the Oregon Country Fair. The fair is a must to call oneself a festival goer. Don’t believe me? Just ask someone who works at the festival.
Over and over we were told we must attend the Country Fair but those recommendations always came with a slew of warnings. “Take lots of money if ya' want to have a good time” was a common warning but unless shopping is an addiction Country Fair can be enjoyed pretty affordably. “Don’t bother with a camera, naked people are everywhere so no photos are allowed” we got this one the most, even as we were stowing our gear on the bike in the parking lot. But we only saw a few topless people and no one ever tried to stop us from taking pictures. There are signs and security posts warning against photography but unless you are specifically focusing on naked or explicit people no one is going to bother you. If you are just trying to photograph naked hippies first let me say that is somewhat strange and you will probably have better luck at the World Naked Bike ride. “It’s just a lot of walking” was a common warning from less active festival goers. This is very true, the venue is huge. However, any festival is a lot of walking, Disneyland is a lot of walking and even a day at the mall is a lot of walking. It seemed strange that recommendations for a hippie fest of that size didn’t come with the advice of “just enjoy, peace” or “be yourself, you’ll have a blast” but it didn’t. Too often mention of the Oregon Country Fair came with comment of political drama surrounding it or a list of do's and don'ts.
It all seemed like typical event complaints to two savvy event promoters like us so my wife and I dove into planning a trip. We always look at the volunteer and vendor opportunities at events. Both are very affordable and sometimes profitable ways to enjoy the event circuits within any genre of festivals. Some individuals, families and businesses make a part time living or exist completely off working at festivals. No such luck with The Oregon Country Fair. There is a pretty involved process to volunteer there and both vendors and staff redefine the word clique. How well you mesh with the group determines everything. The location of your vendor spot, if you can work and even being able to stay overnight depends on hippie hierarchy and whether or not the cool kids in charge like you. While planning our trip we watched some internet videos of the event and very quickly came across negative videos and comments about this very dilemma. Some were of old school vendors hoping the new cool kids in charge would still let them play in the woods and have their usual vending spot. While others were of stores that have been at Country Fair for years saying they just can’t set up shop there anymore. One young lady compared the Country Fair to the American shopping mall saying “People still walk the malls for exercise or to window shop but I don’t make any money for people staring at me.” and she could not have described the Oregon Country Fair any better.
The American shopping mall is stores stacked upon stores in urban hoods with entertainment and attractions. The Oregon Country Fair is one big hippie mall. It has stores stacked upon stores in the woods with entertainment and attractions. The American mall is a clash of culture and fashion for yuppies, preppies, debs, dudes and punk rockers. The Country Fair is a clash of culture and fashion for artists, hippies, hipsters, activists and naturalists. The cool kids rule the mall and the cool kids rule the fair, everyone else is just walking around in their world. Unfortunately, just walking around in their world is exactly what everyone is doing. Not buying anything or even stepping into the stores and shops as much as they used to, not spending any money or even grabbing their contact info to order something later, just walking around… in both worlds. The food court, an arcade or the theatre is where you’ll find everyone hanging out at the mall while the food shack, a concert stage or vaudeville is where you’ll find everyone hanging out at Country Fair. At the mall you can get your hair colored, nails done and make-up while the kids ride go carts or carnival rides. At Country Fair you can get your hair braided, face painted and a tarot card reading while the kids take a yoga class or learn to juggle. While the Oregon Country Fair is a hippie mega mall it does have stark differences from the yuppie mega mall.
You might feel frustrated by a an American mall clerk for following you around the store to get that commission while the annoyance at the Country Fair will come from the shop clerk that won’t come down out of their tree house and you wander back into the stream of people feeling like you just interrupted an acid trip or a really good high. An American mall has an aroma of cologne and perfume that will stick with you for days. Aroma of cologne or perfume at Country Fair will alarm every over sensitive passive aggressive nostril within 50 feet of you. Some of those nostrils probably helped pass anti perfume laws in Oregon cities and most everyone within your sight probably thinks perfume in the air is like graffiti on a wall. You will be received better at Country Fair not showering for days than you will after freshening up with a shot of Axe.
At this point it might appear that I had a bad time or have issue with hippie festivals and malls in general. Nothing could be further from the truth. I had a blast at Country Fair and I rocked a mall or two in my younger years. The similarities make me really question why hippies and yuppies have issue with or poke fun at each other. We are all just painted brothers and sisters trying to eat, smoke and drink our potions while we look at cool stuff. The Oregon Country Fair and the American shopping mall are going through the exact same thing. They are both made up of attractions, entertainment and services to seduce shoppers into a shopping experience and that is exactly what they both are ...shopping experiences, that’s why the first description of each describes stores stacked on stores. Both the Country Fair and the American mall are people watching meccas but like the former fair vendor said “ I don’t make any money for people staring at me”. How soon our economy recovers and if retail sales recover will determine if this is a phase or a fate for each of them.
The Oregon Country Fair truly was a festival that my family and I enjoyed. It’s affordable and there is definitely something there for everyone. The fair is divided into worlds or lands much like a Disney park. In the world of Chela Mela you will find rugs and carpets on the grass for relaxing, pianos that anyone can play are throughout the area. Energy Park showcases state of the art technology for green energy while Wally’s Way features storytelling and childcare. The stages have stellar music of all kinds going the whole weekend and the food is absolutely out of this world. I’m glad we went but ask me if I would go again and I would probably decline. I would maybe go with friends that hadn’t been before and I would definitely recommend this festival to anyone. However, I would not recommend The Oregon Country Fair with the same caveats given to me. I would simply say “just enjoy, peace” or “be yourself, you’ll have a blast” in hopes that one day the cool kids will have a few less do's & don'ts and unity will last well beyond opening ceremonies.
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